Blogging since 4-27-08. This is my journal. A place to share bits of me, my family and life and other things of interest to me, and I hope to you. A place to meet new friends and bond with old. A place to share my thoughts and projects in sewing, beading and needlework. It only takes a moment to say hello!
When I started thinking about what my February page would be about, I looked at my LIST. Since February is the month for hearts, naturally I thought my page should be about one of my favorite Icons, the Queen of Hearts.
Then I read a post by my cyber friend, Stoneweaver. She talked about forgiveness and how sometimes you don't forgive, you accept. Well that all seemed to relate to the heart for me. It got me to thinking about myself. In some regards, its not easy for me to forgive. I have a sister/cousin that I have not forgiven for more than 20 years. I have, however, ACCEPTED the grievance she did to me. That doesn't mean I have forgotten it, or that I want to talk to her. It means that I have accepted what she did and I choose not to associate with her. Simple for me. Its locked away and I rarely think of it.
Can my heart be pure if I choose not to forgive? After all, its this ONE thing. I have forgiven so many others for wrongs that were equally as brutal.
See this pearl...its not perfect.
However, it's how I view the center of my heart. An imperfect pearl. Yet most pearls aren't perfect, are they? How many can claim a perfect heart, anyway. Are they honest if they do? And if their heart is not perfect and they claim it to be....well, you can see the thoughts go on and on.
Oh, you are wondering why those black beads are trailing through the center of my imperfect heart, huh?
Well, there are more black beads.
They are the shadow caused by an unforgiven grievance.
But here is the rest of my heart. It has a small shadow. And a path of darkness that runs through. The dark beads at the bottom are dark deeds from the past and the light beads have risen to the top. They have overcome the dark beads and their light glows all around my heart. Its' beams reach out and long to touch all they come in contact with.
OMG, I can't believe I said all that. I knew my page changed direction, but I truly didn't know the significance until I gathered my beading thoughts and put them into words in this post.